I encountered a man once who always talked about politics, blaming politicians and the government. This is all he did. He lived his life blaming others. And when things were wrong in his life, he would always say, “Well, God wants this,” and “Why is God doing this??” It was never his fault, but always another person’s fault. Either a real person in politics or an imaginary belief in the skies. And on top of that, he would look around him daily. If he felt wrong or somehow upset, frustrated or angry, he would blame his boss, or his neighbors, or his own wife. He was totally arrogant and wouldn’t see his own weakness in the pitiful blaming game he was constantly playing.
Life is a string of moments. These moments, each one of them, are originated by choices. Intimate or very personal choices. We are always choosing, even if we are not aware of it. We have a conscious and subconscious. When the conscious does not choose, the subconscious does; and it is automatic. The subconscious is reflected in our habits and behaviors, the ones we are not fully aware of taking. The issue is that if the economy is bad, then you will blame your life on this in order to feel better about your bad conscious and subconscious choices. The same happens with everything in your life. And this is running away from your personal responsibilities.
If you divorce or break up, then you will blame the other person. At least most people do this. In your anxious mind, this excuses you from your own misguided behavior during the relationship. So, what you are doing is denying your own faults; and by this denial you are programming your subconscious to keep making wrong choices in the future. This is not working on yourself, and it is keeping you down in terms of love, happiness, and that great feeling of success we all want. Focusing on yourself, in the other hand, helps you see your own faults; thus you can better understand your own subconscious programming, fix it, and through some soul-searching better yourself.
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