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Poetry and prose from the heart. Stories to ponder.

The reflection.

“The course of true love never did run smooth.”  ~ William Shakespeare, ‘A Midsummer Night’s Dream.’


“So it’s true, when all is said and done, grief is the price we pay for love.”  ~ E.A. Bucchianeri; novelist.


 

The reflection

I was seeing myself in the reflection,
The world in me was full of tension;
Violence and arguments in constant display,
The outer world’s madness night and day.

Thoughts of anger threatened my sanity,
Beauty and obsession were sheer vanity;
Depression, people’s demands were upon me,
Worries of the future did not let myself be.

Love was a thing I never knew, never understood,
But beyond my self-pity my heart told me I should;
Experiences I had allowed to keep me down,
Past memories and rejections had me bound.

I had neglected you as a friend but you remained,
Your beauty, personality with my anger had stained;
Many moments I had hated myself in my own lunacy,
Poison in my blood was affecting my heart brutally.

One day tears of deep expression in your eyes,
They made me turn and see through my own lies;
There was absolute truth and divinity in your soul,
There was immediate light and truth as my goal.

I sensed my world moving forward into the light,
Not anymore held I society and man to that height;
Love was a new horizon in my life, now bells rang,
You made my reflection beautiful, now angels sang.

~ Asa Rodriguez.

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Self-help life truths. The free mind of a human god!

Perfect tune.

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” ~ Mahatma Gandhi.


“To survive in peace and harmony, united and strong, we must have one people, one nation, one flag.” ~ Pauline Hanson; Australian politician and founder.


 

Harmony is living the moment with acceptance, not letting thoughts of negativity and ignorance rule your life, not letting other people rule your life.  We all know that there is a lack of harmony in the world today, only a few of us really live in harmony and understand that this condition is the condition of the soul, of the whole universe.

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Harmony does not just mean the absence of physical violence, of course.  People all over the world punish themselves every day without realizing it, by engaging with stressful situations and not watching their inner states, by being angry at others, by rejecting true love, by putting down others, by neglecting themselves, etc.

This is the opposite of harmony, the opposite of getting in touch with their own souls and embracing self-love.

 

Wisdom is seeing through all these things I just mentioned and accepting that it is what it is, accepting that you cannot change the world by force or by being angry with it; but, however, you can embrace harmony and peace within yourself by living based on truth and nobility, by uniting thought, word, and action into pure love which you can then expand onto others.

Worry about finding harmony in you. As Buddha puts it, “Peace comes from within. Do not seek it without.”

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Self-help life truths. The free mind of a human god!

Free!

“The wrong person will give you less than what you’re worth but that doesn’t mean that you have to accept it.”  ~ Sonya Parker; author, blogger, and activist.


“The wrong person makes you beg for attention, affection, love and commitment. The right person gives you these things because they love you.” ~ Unknown.


 

Honor life and respect yourself daily by not engaging with people whose only purpose is to be negative, even if those people are family and you live with them; but engage and instruct yourself with those who care and support you, those who are eager to lend a hand and see you succeed.  Life is too precious and short to waste on the wrong people (even if those people gave you birth).

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Free your mind from the chains of others.

Quite often then those negative or ignorant people surrounding us are family or friends; therefore, it might be hard to avoid conversation with them, but still you can be conscious of who you are and protect your mind from negativity.
Mental and spiritual elevation is individual as Jesus and Buddha have showed us with their examples; so, no one can elevate you and take you to success and happiness, no religion created by the ego of man, no family that loves you or hates you, but you yourself are the light to the world, to your word.

Self-love is about seeing beyond people and institutions, is about loving yourself so much that you create your own path.  So do not focus on the people around you which may be trying to bring you down, but understand that the ego is powerful and so they might feel failure on their own lives and perhaps a bit jealous.
Never take anything personal (even if it is a close family member), people have their own demons or inner struggles and quite often this is a heavy burden they carry (even if they have a smile upon their faces).

Be wise and take a breath whenever someone tries to hurt you or bring you down in any way, forgive and forget, and if you have to, walk away. Focus your mind on yourself and on your path.

Here the word ‘salvation’ does not just mean spiritual salvation, but it is about everything related to your individual human progress. “Work out your own salvation. Do not depend on others.”  ~ Buddha.

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Self-help life truths. The free mind of a human god!

The really neglected

“You, yourself, as much as anybody in the entire universe, deserve your love and affection.”  ~ Buddha.


“We are each gifted in a unique and important way.  It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light.”  ~ Mary Dunbar; British artist, illustrator, and teacher.


 

Many people think that the greatest gift is doing for others, so they spend their lives giving and giving, exhausting themselves and suffering for and with others, whether these others are close loved ones or just acquaintances; however, it is superficial, man-made love which they give, while they fool themselves and swim in pride telling themselves that they are really good people for constantly thinking and doing about others.
They live this life of sacrifice for others while neglecting their own bodies and minds, because they believe this is what Jesus, Buddha, and others did; and all because of the narrow-minded interpretation religions have brought to the mind of man.

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Putting all nonsense and absurdity aside, the most important thing to do first in life is to take care of yourself, of your body and mind, because this is self-love.

How do you think Jesus, Buddha, Hermes, and all these ancient masters did what they did, had the deep wisdom and understanding to extremely love others…??  They knew that self-love is the heart of spreading love, real love essence out into the world; because without embracing first self-love you are neglecting your true self–and if you do not even love yourself truly (spirit, body, and mind), how can real love expand outwardly onto others…??

It is the popular madness of people to say words of love and do acts of love, and say a prayer for this and some prayer for that; however, their bodies are neglected, their minds are unwise, their lives are lived blindly.  They do not even notice this in their narrow views and understanding, but their love is superficial because no true self-love exists in them.

And if you are reading this, and you are one of these people who do this superficial love while neglecting taking care of your body and mind, you recognize deep inside that I am talking about you, even though your ego wants to fight these words and look for excuses.

I tell the truth because the truth is the only reality, the one which makes me truly blissful, and the only one which can help anyone develop themselves.  It is up to you to remain unwise and foolish, or to see your ego as it is, get out of your comfort zone, and take care of yourself, develop true self-love.

 

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The free mind of a human god!

Quintessence.

“And what, Socrates, is the food of the soul?  Surely, I said, knowledge is the food of the soul.” ~ Plato; Greek educator and philosopher.


 

 

Life, as built by the common man and their narrow mind, is a myriad of confusion and ups and downs, unhealthy habits and misery, and so all of us try to do the best we can; therefore, we try to find happiness and deeper connections in the things we do and in other people surrounding us.  Challenges rise and we either face them or not; but to face them sometimes we need to understand our inner strengths and the light we are within, such which knows no fear and which is all confidence and might. 

If we inquire within ourselves and discover this light, we wake up from the deep slumber our societies are all about, so we begin our individual process of Awakening.

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As one becomes awakened, the first symptom or mental elevation that one notices is the desire for knowledge, and also, very pronounced as well, the experience of bliss in the simpler things of life, like waking up early, walking the dog, going to work, or walking through nature.

All this and more makes you aware of yourself and of your environment, and that process alone is the soul intensifying itself through your journey, through the rich experiences of your personal awakening.  This is something we recognize in the moment, but not always understand.  The full recognition and understanding comes with deep meditation practices.

But the soul itself is the one which is most affected by the life we choose to lead, including our deep-rooted beliefs and our perceptions; for the soul is the essence that opens the portal between our consciousness (or spirit) and our physical bodies (including the mind).

When our minds suffer because of mental conflict or wrong beliefs that the ego creates, or even because we clash or differ with people we care about, we feel a little neglected, alone, or even dejected spiritually, down or depressed, and so we may fall into bad eating habits, drugs, religious fanaticism, violent behaviors, etc. etc.; therefore, this can be conceptualized as the soul “hurting” or “being mistreated by us,” “detaching a little from our pain.”

 

This knowledge, if remembered, may aid us in the elevation of our minds, knowing what happens to us, and within us, as we journey along our challenging lives.

 

The Soul


 

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Poetry and prose from the heart. The free mind of a human god!

The well-oiled machine

“To enjoy good health, to bring true happiness to one’s family, to bring peace to all, one must first discipline and control one’s own mind.  If a man can control his mind he can find the way to Enlightenment, and all wisdom and virtue will naturally come to him.”  ~ Buddha.

 

 

The well-oiled Machine

Far away my land of dreams expands my very human soul,

Where I was born and my heart beats for the terrain whole.

The rich earth beneath my naked feet designs the extensive harvest,

The mountains supply the water, the cool shade, the precious garnet,

The sky is blue and conscious of its everlasting majesty,

The birds sing to delight my people beyond all tragedy.

 

My mind expresses itself through my daily behavior,

My soul rules my mind, it expresses itself as my savior;

For the right mental expression I require higher elevation,

Knowledge, truth, health, love, the right sensation.

My body is the connection to my very vitality,

I must eat healthy and correct my mentality.

 

Every day I must act godly and see my body as a temple,

Powerful, incorruptible, poised, well-nourished, gentle.

There are poisons which kill the earth,

There are temptations since birth;

Of the earth my being must protect its merits,

Of my mind and body respect its divine inherence.

 

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Self-help life truths.

Warrior’s strength.

“No legacy is so rich as honesty.”  ~ William Shakespeare; English poet, playwright, and actor.


It is well known that life is pressure and stress quite often, and so you might feel like concealing something from yourself and from others.  Perhaps like in school, when children, telling yourself you’d do homework later after the video games, when you had your friends coming over to play with you and so you knew that you wouldn’t have time to do homework later, or even have a desire to do so later.  Just kids, right?

But that kid grew up.  And you must take responsibility for your actions now, good ones and not so good ones, and you must embrace every little thing that happens.  This is the mature and strong kid still in you, now grown up, experienced, but still a creative kid that has to embrace imagination and solve problems and accept those challenges with a positive attitude.  The attitude of the master of your life.

Absolute honesty means a free mind and an unpolluted heart, and it is the very core of the truly awakened one. See, if you must hide anything or trick others, deceive yourself and keep yourself tied to a belief deep inside you know to be nonsense, then, it is a lack of confidence and self-love that is ruling your inner being.
Subconsciously, something has taken your reality captive, you are not totally free and you need to make up your own reality, while affecting others. This is deceiving yourself, distancing yourself from all light, bringing more suffering into your life (perhaps without your own knowledge).

You must accept who you are with your flaws and strengths, with your failings and achievements; otherwise, you are just running away from the present and from the real you (where you can certainly find utter bliss).
And you are allowing yourself to grow your ego and create more dysfunction in your own mind, while affecting your loved ones and the ones who want to connect with you in the process.

Be honest with yourself and with others.  The path to all light.

 

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Honesty is being true with yourself and with others. This process takes a higher mind and is not that easy to keep all the time; and so it is why most people fail at this.  Absolute honesty we may call a strength of the powerful, because it is getting over the temptation to lie and using the energy in a constructive manner, a constructive force.

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The free mind of a human god!

The way of the magic (1-min. read)

“The true sign of intelligence is not knowledge but imagination.”  ~ Albert Einstein; German-American physicist and major influencer on the philosophy of science.
     Everything you see with your mind and with your physical eyes as well, and everything you experience within and around you is made up of energy, highly conscious energy.  The great buildings, the great art, computers, trees, grass, soil, clouds, air, relationships, events, humans and animals, the past, the present, the future, and absolutely everything else you can think of is born and sustained out of energy; such energy shaping and guiding it all, the energy which creates it all.  And when it comes to the man-made stuff I just mentioned, like great buildings, it was first born into the mind of someone; therefore, someone saw it within his mind, moved the psychic energy around to fit a shape, quality and meaning, and compiled it into a vivid realization with a unique message for the human race, then that same mind worked with other minds and brought the mental image into the outer material world, but great imagination is always behind it all.
     In human relationships, for example, there are so many arguments and disputes, bad judgements and frustrations, break-ups and divorces, all misunderstandings and misconceptions which lead to confusion, disappointment and suffering, because most of us forget or ignore the existence and higher purpose of this energy or energies; hence, the building essence of all relationships is to find a way (and there is always a way) to work together as families, friends, lovers, partners, neighbors, etc. etc., but we ignorantly use our ego (which is not even close to the energies of imagination and creativity) while believing erroneously that our reason and perspective, intellect, can always fix and enrich everything.  This is our lower-thinking because it is guided by the ego and its selfishness (even though we might not think we are being selfish at the time; the purpose of the ego is to make it look normal and deceive us into thinking we are right and fair).
     Imagination is not just creating a beautiful work of art or innovating with a brilliant idea, but it is knowing how to create value within your own persona and share that value with others in relationships, it is how to work out problems or issues and get to solutions in your life, and perhaps most importantly is the moving of people by connecting with them and not by enforcing your opinions or demands in a certain situation–for example, if you and your significant other have a problem and you enforce your views then there is going to be resistance and maybe even frustration in the other person; however, if you use and manage your imagination you can come up with a more meaningful way in which you can benefit both, and that can help you get a better connection in the relationship and deeper understanding of both viewpoints.
Imagination is that which builds, because it molds to the higher understanding and necessity of the human being, it is flexible and nonlinear; but reason and logic do not build, because they are strict, linear.
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     But the ego does not build, it deceives people into thinking reason and logic out of the ego-mind creates and designs all; however, whatever creates true beauty and absolute harmony in the world and in all your relationships is divine energy, or energy which is not flawed or bias like the ego energies of the mind.  This divine energy (which is only called “divine” because it comes from far beyond time and space and the very mortality of man) is all true creativity and honest manifestation of beauty and strength, and by being shaped and given qualities by our minds then it is called imagination due to the images we form with it.
“You can’t do it unless you can imagine it.”  ~ George Lucas; American filmmaker and entrepreneur.
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     But, you see, the imagination within our minds, or the essence of this energy, is raw, unformed, with no qualities and textures of this physical reality, because this, as mentioned above, is divine energy coming from beyond space and time (space and time is created by the movement of matter, is created by our mundane thought to fit our corporeal lives here); however, this is highly conscious and dynamic energy which is inside each cell of our bodies, each nerve, and all around us making the rich and creative substance of universes themselves, and so this means that we have to interact with it all the time to bring this raw energy into the material world and in this way design what we would like to see and experience every single day–i.e. more patience and care in relationships, money and prosperity, motivation and intention to succeed in helping and accepting others, more talents to further our own advancement in life, etc. etc.
     Imagination is the moving forward of all beauty and truth through the interaction of our minds in creating peace and prosperity, love and motivation; but, this is deep understanding of the Higher Mind now, it must have our honest and dedicated effort to bring it into our lives as we wish constantly, and the issue we have to always be aware of is that we are always creating and desiring, whether we want to or not, consciously or subconsciously.
     So in order to build manifestations centered in good relationships, a better financial status, greater motivation to succeed, higher visions of what you must do to better yourself, make sure your heartfelt desires and higher perspectives about yourself, others and the world around you, stay away from the deceits of your ego before you create using the greater energy of imagination.
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The free mind of a human god!

The bright light behind the fog.

“Follow the path of the unsafe, independent thinker.  Expose your ideas to the danger of controversy.  Speak your mind and fear less the label of ‘crackpot’ than the stigma of conformity.”  ~ Thomas J. Watson; American businessman, pioneer in the development of accounting and computer equipment used today.
     An illusion is a distortion of the senses, revealing how the brain normally organizes and interprets sensory stimulation.
Have these in mind– How do most people come to know what they know? Through other people, thoughts, ideas, self-deceits of their own minds, and books, right…?? And, more precisely, how are these same thoughts arising and how are they written…?? By human beings with an ego and a goal to reach, after thinking the thoughts in their mind.

Let us switch now–

      Mindfulness is the practice of being aware of what is happening or what you are experiencing in the present moment or situation.  It is being COMPLETELY here and now without judgment, chastising or blaming, without comparison and without any kind of conflict in your mind.  This is a capacity that all human beings possess.  Whenever you bring awareness into what you’re directly experiencing via your senses, or to your state of mind via your thoughts and emotions, you’re being mindful.  The physiological reason is that breaths, by paying full attention to your breath, taken mindfully tend to be slow and deep, which stimulates the vagus nerve, activating the parasympathetic nervous system.  It lowers stress, reduces heart rate and blood pressure, and calms you down.  The psychological reason is that when you put your attention intensely on the breath, you are fully in the present for the duration of the breath.  To feel regretful, you need to be in the past; to worry, you need to be in the future.
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      We all enter this world pure, fearless, without doubt and struggle, untainted by duality and delusions of the flesh, full of love and wisdom; imagine a new-born baby and you’ll understand perfectly.  The whole problem of suffering and delusion starts when the baby comes out of the mother and learns to make use of the physical senses, and, on top of that, the adults around him teach him wrong, teach him about insecurity, fear, difference in people and nature, about how limited their own intelligence is and how to conform to one mindset about a specific religion, about patriotism, about monetary values, about how to think and the importance of an ideal or a person up on a pedestal–fanaticism about a preferred sport’s team, a movie star, a prophet or philosopher, any rigid mindset that creates an unbending mind.
     But a mind should flow like a river, mold into the formless and shapeless essence of truth, love, and ABSOLUTE AGILITY of strength (not be lazy or rigid, but able to move quickly and easily, a weightless and stress-free mind).  Early infancy is when the brain absorbs all the information the physical senses feed, just like a sponge; from then on, the mind is being poisoned and troubled, and the wisdom and fearlessness, love and positive thinking remains under chains by the conditioning and all the garbage fed to it by parents, religious practices, patriotism, government, and so on and so forth.  These muddy layers of haughty and erroneous beliefs which oppress the soul or the mind of the growing individual turn into stone and shape the personality into the mundane and short-sighted, it robs the potential for greatness in the human being; therefore, we should all get rid of all this baggage that only creates stress and a weighty mind with fear and doubt and pride, lack of wisdom, mental and physical illness, and crooked perceptions of everything we experience.

Absolutely no being is born into this world with evil or with hatred towards anything, because the pure heart does not produce evil, the pure, untainted heart only produces the natural condition, love, peace and bliss, which are one unity, one condition of wholeness, the one existent and irrevocable truth, one universal consciousness, ONENESS, complete harmony and perfection; but, however, evil and erroneous belief is created by thought, by human conditioning, by weakness of our own choosing when we attach to a rigid mindset, when we follow other weak and poisoned minds.  Because we have all forgotten our natural state or condition of love and unity, and thus felt fear, doubt, without purpose, being led by our mundane and egotistical physical senses, which run amok untamed and unguarded, our perception of reality becomes narrow and confused and we start thinking darkly and empty; as in we need something, we are not whole, we need security, we need love to be whole again, we need a leader to straighten our path and guide us because we feel too weak and ordinary, maybe even broken by our past or by our vices, to find it alone.

     All delusions of the human mind, obviously; a sure way to feed the ego and create a false belief, for a false belief offers so-called “security” to the ego and the means to feed that delusion, it all creates pleasure to the physical senses.  And in following our self-pity, by whining mentally–“I can’t do this and won’t even try,” “What’s the point…??,” “I do not have an education so I can’t start a business,” “I have been smoking for too long to change now,” “I need someone to bless me for I am a sinner and I need to go to church to wash my sins away”–our minds become weak and victims of the ego and its designed fears.
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     One sure way to stop this vicious cycle of fear and self-pity is to become aware of our present, live that present and be the best we can be in that same present, not wait to give our best in the following hours or tomorrow or the next day, but give our full attention to the moment, seize the moment and find pure happiness there no matter what the situation is or where you are.  If you fall in the trap of following others or expecting others to raise you up, then you will live your life in parts, not as a whole, and you will encounter moments of fear, doubt, and misery.
    I know this from experience, because when I used to follow a leader in church, or become engaged by the nonsense in the news, or follow the illogical beliefs of the egos of others, or compared the success of another with my own success, or try to always please others, I would quite often become mentally depressed and hateful.  And that is no way to live a full and rich life; it steals the motivation and beauty of life in you.
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     We must be vigilant in this and remain always aware of our thoughts and the reactions we have.  We must stop following the news and others telling us what the reality of life and of God itself really is, for our unique perceptions in meditation or mindfulness of the present is the only one we should trust and rely upon.
      
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The free mind of a human god!

Alchemy.

“The domain of individual destiny is controlled by an interplay of many cosmic forces, mainly benign; but in the present world society, due to mankind’s misunderstanding of both earthly and heavenly purposes, these forces have been turned to other uses, frequently chaotic and disintegrating.”  ~ Count St. Germain; alchemist, painter, philosopher, essayist, poet, diplomat, philanthropist, musician.

 

When most of us hear the word ‘Alchemy’ we picture an old sage in ancient times leaning against a hot pot stirring and stirring and creating mysterious fumes while wearing a large robe, mainly stirring and stirring to create some elixir or to turn lead into gold.  But that is just the superficial part of the science of Alchemy; because, in fact, Alchemy started the sciences we have today–i.e. chemistry, psychology, botany, geology, physics, anatomy, physiology, etc. etc.  Let us have in mind not just ‘Alchemy’ but ‘Mental Alchemy,’ because the human mind is all in the Alchemy of the true sage, because the human mind hides mysterious and fascinating energies to transmute the lead of the ego of simple man into the gold of the god-man.  So there is the study of who we are, and I do not mean our names or cultures, nationalities or the identities we create for ourselves; however, I mean the study of who we are beyond this waking thought we experience every day and this body made of flesh and bone.  To be more precise, is the study and discovery of our true Inner Self, which some may call Spiritual Self or Divine Energy; hence, it is about the energy and essence that makes us and sustains our life, which connects us to one another and to all nature, precisely all nature from the dust on the earth and the insect on it to the planets and stars in the vast dark above us.

The roots of Alchemy date back to ancient Egypt, and perhaps even before that, and a mysterious manuscript called ‘The Emerald Tablets.’  Alchemy arrived in Spain during the Arabian occupation by the Moors and then spread to the rest of Europe.  Alchemy reigned as the supreme science in Europe for about 1,700 years.  In fact, many of the cathedrals of the Middle Ages carry alchemical symbols and secret formulae.

alchemy3This is a coin minted from alchemical gold showing the symbol of lead (the ignorant, waking mind of the simple man) going up to heaven to transmute into gold (the mind of the god-man or the superior, spiritual intellect in man).

Only a very few adepts knew of the essential agent, the sublime heat of the soul, which fuses the emotions, consumes the prison of leaden form and allows entry into the higher world.  Carl Jung made alchemical methods part of modern psychology when he talks about the subconscious mind in man (the Infinite Intelligence in man).

But, you see, reader, the true science of Alchemy is the science of the spirit in man; therefore, because is about the spirit and so it does not have anything to do with machinations of men or material temples or churches built by men, religions of the world do not have a claim on this higher science.  Because the spiritual, the divine in man, the gold in man must not be confused with the crude, the ignorant dogmas and ideas in the simple man, the lead which is of the lower man. alchemy1

 

As people grow throughout life, they start to imitate one another, consciously and subconsciously, mimicking the personalities and identities which they see fit and which brings pleasure to his daily lives.  Because of their new adopted views in religion, society, nationality, culture, etc., and due to becoming fearful followers and not leaders of their own lives, most dwell in a sense of unreality as they become victims of themselves under the ideas and interpretations of others, and subsequently they persist in identifying themselves as vile sinners dependent of some human leader and a divine god up in the skies to deliver them to some promised land.  People thus become victims and go throughout life blind to their fortunes and believing in some divine blessing or curse falling upon them, and they are never masters of their destinies but humble servants of their own egos; that is, enslaved to their wild imaginations and ego-created fears.

This fear and ignorance transforms their thoughts and feelings into hell on earth; however, the purpose of all thought and feeling is to give us the beautiful form of wise and individual experience, to thus shape our self-confidence and unique personas into higher intellects, higher personas in the spiritual and mental realms.  So we Alchemists, true and wise Alchemists today and always, understand this and embrace this in our hearts; because we recognize that thoughts and feelings are exposed to sadness and misery as well as higher intelligence and wisdom, and in order to have only the latter we need to lead and not follow, have a free mind and accept who we are beyond all idea and form.  By stopping to watch TV, by not falling into the shopping and commercial trap, by not following society and religion, by not choosing an identity based on friends and family, by not imitating others, by watching the food-energy we put in our bodies, etc. etc., this can be accomplished.

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So, life is not meant for us to embrace mediocrity and be content with following the herd, and it is not meant for us to massacre our higher purpose by living in the fear and anxiety all TV, society, religion, nationality, culture creates; but it is meant for us to be unique in all aspects and raise above all feelings of fear and anxiety.  Every human being has mighty energies and capacities, from the homeless person living under the bridge to the spiritual Alchemist who feels one with all, and so this is why we are born and given thoughts and feelings inside a physical form; and, even though most people do not really understand and embrace that fact in their behaviors, we must accept what we do not see and hear in our heads, we must realize that we all have the capacities to be Alchemists and lead our own lives, the capacities to turn crude lead into divine gold, because no society, religion, father or mother, friend or acquaintance, can do it for you, can better your life.