If you really do understand why you suffer this, that all has a purpose, then learn from it, study the mechanics of that suffering, accept your weaknesses and do not make more excuses. Awakening is a process you initiate when you become aware of your own garbage.
Awakening is about doing something to understand your own suffering and darkness, and as soon as you understand it then you can improve your life. Period! Wake yourself from your own slumber. Don’t just read about awakening and repeat it like a damn parrot.
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